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Coding Confessional

Anonymous Confessions from Programmers.

Confess

Anonymous Confessions from Programmers.

Confess
I swear to god if our next project will require compatibility with IE someone will get hurt.

Will the feeling of never being a good enough developer ever fade?

Whenever I start working with a new language or platform I immediately hate it, after a while using it I don't care either way, makes ne think I don't like programming, I just tolerate it.

Everyone just meets the written requirements and sweep all problems under the rug. Every attempt to improve anything is met with heavy resistance even though it will greatly benefit literally everybody involved. These people like to complain about all these issues when the real issue is this culture that they've cultivated. I know it's bad to stick out and it's not my job to tell people what to do, but recently in team meetings i've started speaking for 10 minutes at a time giving examples of problems that were simply ignored or swept under the rug as always. After our last team meeting I was told I should probably not care about these things so much since it won't benefit my career. I was also told I should watch out for myself. I'm afraid I'm beginning to agree with them.

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Sometimes I wonder if I've dug my self too deep into this coding hole I'll never be able to get out a normal person.

I think that massive uni circle-jerk of teaching Java is killing young devs creativity and interest in writing beautiful, reusable and maintainable code. People out of school are no more than factory line workers these days.

I know that people on here hate agile and SCRUM. But our project manager use a shared google docs excel document with colored fields to keep track of tasks and nobody knows what half of the tasks are. At least a SCRUM board is easy to understand.

Do you ever "advise" your client into requiring less functionality so you don't have to spend a lot of time and brain power building their project.

Seven millions stackoverflow members, their code literally runs the world of seven billion.

I am one of those guys that bullshits in interviews and then goes on to be a shitty employee

As an undergrad, I really enjoy the coding related confessions, but are devs really that toxic? Or is this all fun & irony.

The company i work for has employed a co-worker to assist me with design. I'm resp. for all design because i'm the only one there who knows how to do it & make it cool. She has no literally knowledge (design&coding) so instead of helping me,im discussing with / teaching her the whole time. Beside the that she is messing up my project files regulary, she has told me quite frankly that she don't want to learn all the software and why we just dont use Photoshop for everything. She also want to discuss that with our boss. Her idea is completely dumb but i want her to discuss it with my boss so he realizes what i'm forced to bear. I have not touched code for 2 months and wont because i have to work with her. I, as a school dropout, have seen alot but she makes me questioning human intelligence.

I Released a beta Version to broaden the test Basis and got no feedback at all. Either I'm too good, which is not the case, or people are simply not using the damn thing and don't care, which makes it an unborn failure. Gosh, so frustrated.

Fuck You! "It didn't work" doesn't tell me anything! Give me the fucking error text you dumb fuck! God I'm tired of dumb motherfuckers who heard that you can earn a good living as a "computer specialist" and lied their ass off at the interview and now expect me to fix their issues with a combination of mind reading and sorcery. Fuck!

Cant stopthe Bill Cosby code, from coming into life

Skillfully navigating the corporate politics is more important than technical skills. I learned that very early on. Social skills are more important. Spend more time developing a charismatic personality. Charisma + tech skills = unstoppable.

I got a new job in a big software company and was super excited and hyper motivated. After some months my boss say that he thinks about to fire me again because I "demotivate" the team because I am to fast and want to move to fast. His suggestion was to shut up and just do my tasks. Why dump and slow people got leading positions?

I hate my supervisor because he is slow old and Incompetent. I want his position to lead the team.

FUCK YOU ALL THIS APP ITS A SHIT THIS IS NOT LIKE THE SECRET APP TO POST WEIRD AND KINKY CONFESSIONS THIS IS TOTALLY A BIG SHIT AND BORING.... ABOUT CONFESSING PROBLEMS AT YOUR BUSINESS AND WORKS AND ALOT OF GUDGE PLEASE FUCK YOU BUNCH OF INDIOTS AND THIS SICK AND STUPID RETARD APP JUST FOR LOSERS WITHOUT SOCIAL LIFE! GET A LIFE BITCH AND SUCK MY DICK!!! 🖕🏼

I have a pretty strict rule about eating one medium sized booger after 25 lines of code.

I'm tired of new people that want to learn programming. Not all of them, but vast majority be like: "i have 0 maths background, i hate logical thinking, i don't like learning new stuff, gimme resources so i can create a fucking operating system plsssssss!". Just look at the shit that is happening on learn programming subreddit. It's fucking painful. All of that is caused by stupid motherfuckers spreading misinformation: "programming is for everyone", "even the dumbest motherfucker on earth can learn how to program". I hope all those wannabe journalists will be fired.

is it possible for you to sound any more disgusting?

absolve for weak, condemn for strong types