Coding Confessional

Anonymous Confessions from Programmers.


Anonymous Confessions from Programmers.

"sign up for diversity and inclusion training". let me just sneak this pistol into my mouth.

To managers. How to demotivate developers: - read a book/article about how developers can write all the UI tests for a totally different application (later you can fire manual QA, yay!) - don't check if prerequisites are met for said tests (things like easily generated accounts, totally independent test runs) - force them to write these and ignore warnings from the test automation guys (Hey, you've read it on Forbes! It must be true! And you are a manager!) (When I quitted we had exactly the same problems with our tests than a year before - you can't really fix them if your preconditions are not met).

I feel so offended, harassed and hated just for having the "wrong gender" by so many posts here. Maybe, next time you feel the need to insult women or homosexuals and use abusive, degrading words, ask yourself if you would say the same out loud in person or say the same to your grandma/mother/sister/girlfriend/friend: Peace.

Turned in my notice this morning. Manager starting asking me all these questions about what I wanted to do in my career and my goals. What the fuck motherfucker, you've given me performance reviews half a dozen times and you ask me all this when I quit?

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One account is $100 away from finally breaking a million. Yeah me!

Assuming the distribution of talent is exactly the same for every human being, when you add policies to favor hiring minorities you inevitably start making sub-optimal hiring decisions: if 10% of the candidates is from group X but you want your new hires to be 30% of the X group, two thirds of your X-type employees will be underskilled. Inclusion policies should really be at the education/university level, so companies will get evenly distributed candidates.

I'm sick of working with lazy people. Due the fact that majority of my colleagues never bother to read manuals or try the obvious, the first response I get is something like "did you read the manual ?". My first reaction would be "no shit genius, if the manual would work, do you think I would ask you ?" but then I remember the countless times I assumed my interlocutor actually read the manual and spend hours trying to debug an nonexistent issue. Fuck this field is crammed with lazy ass motherfuckers!

kinda hyped for the OP5 launch...


Got hired in a new company as a software developer(hoping for working in big data domain) but now for the past 2 months, i am working on setting up a private cloud for the company. (No interested in devops side, and this is not the developer stuff i hoped for). -From India

ive gotten a little more experience since i lasted posted about this on here, but i'm a 27 year old virgin and i've been on a total of 2 dates now

I browse linked in for attractive blonde recruiters, and only accept invites from hot recruiters. Have fantasies of banging them at their office while they get me a million dollar contract for surfing the web. Ohhh what a dream...

No, your company is not a "startup" when its been around for 6 years and has 150 employees. No, you can't use the "well its a startup" excuse to cut corners, pay people less, give them shitty benefits, and no job stability. No, I'm not going put in extra effort because I believe in your company's "vision". No, you are not a startup, you have a company that's been around for years that has made less profit than a fucking lemonade stand.

I made a recruiter cry because I told her she misrepresented me and I thought that she was an amateur at her job while I am a professional. I told her she lost me a very lucrative job offer.

Unit testing Django apps is useless when compared to RSpec in Rails.

I am finally a convert to the whole SOLID thing. Great stuff!

Library and framework pollution are making the already terrible JavaScript landscape worse. just because you can doesn't mean you should.

how bad of an idea would it be to gamble everything I've saved up on an upcoming stock's er. if it hits, i can get the fuck out of this faggot industry. if it does not, i can blow my brains out.

Jason Genova would wreck all of you.

I work in silicon valley and make about a third of the average salary for a programmer here. Doesn't that mean I should be putting about 30% effort into my work?

I just started working on a Django project, having spent the last 6 years doing Rails, and 10 years of Perl before that. I don't understand how anyone gets anything done with Django. Everything feels like I'm back in 1999 again.

I need hope making a living with "that". Used to be a web dev 5 yrs (confessed before about buzz-lib-framework-changingparadigmeveryweek-shit) .. Do you think native Android development maybe a better choice? Thinking of making a cut and give it a try at age of 38 :-/

So sick of our daily status phone calls. I get a headache trying to understand these stupid foreigners. It's bad enough they barely speak English but they could at least mute their phones while not speaking. Constant static, beeping noises, background conversations, phones ringing etc. They've been told 1,000 times to MUTE THEIR FUCKING PHONES.

Do the majority of women get their jobs out of some sort of guilt or obligation(talking about non-technical jobs)? Never seen a bigger gaggle of dumb fucking cunts in my life.

A few months back my company had an opening for a developer position. A guy from the local tech community approached me about it and was interested. I gave him my contact info and he contacted me countless times with questions and we met a few times to discuss the job. I wrote him a long letter of recommendation because he seemed to know his stuff and was personable. He never got the job and I never heard a word from him again. Saw him at another meetup and he pretended to not even recognize me and gave me dirty looks. I stuck my neck out for this guy and he totally dicked me off in return. It's not my fault you suck at interviewing you prick. Never again.