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Coding Confessional

Anonymous Confessions from Programmers.

Confess

Anonymous Confessions from Programmers.

Confess
if Jira told me to kick myself in the nuts, I'd find a way to get it done.

I think only the best programmers should be allowed to have kids. If you do front-end or really enjoy C++, it's a big nope. Too many people in the world already. Gotta prioritize those genes.

Scrum Truth = { Management: "Hey developer is that a 3 or a 5?", Developer: "Definitely a 5, maybe even an 8.", Architect: "I would call it a 5.", Developer: ... Management: "Okay lets call it a five then, so we can pretend we're being fair, and we don't have to feel bad when you put in over- time, for no additional pay." Developer: "Okay. Thank you. I'm just happy to have a job sir." }

Is there a place for us developers to rank and review "technical recruiters" or should I make one? Don't get me wrong, there some good recruiters but half are dim-witted fucks who don't understand the difference between java and javascript. No wonder there is such a "skill" gap, these fuckers don't know the goddamn difference between markup languages like html/xml and actual logic driven programming languages....

Telesketch iPhone App
Play Telesketch
A multiplayer, drawing game from the idiot behind Coding Confessional.
What is the best way to beat a drug test these days (marijuana only)?

is this career field worth it I'm thinking about making a change, from financial advisor. I have some background in CSS and html5 but that's it thanks guys. Be honest and upfront no bullshit please.

WORK! FUCKING WORK! WORK TILL YOU FUCKING DIE! BREAK YOUR FUCKING BACK WORKING!!!! WORK! WORK!!! WORK YOU FUCKING CUNT! have a dollar. FUCKING WORK!! WORK AND FUCKING BE THANKFUL FOR IT!! FUCKING BUST YOUR ASS WORKING! have a dollar.

my cup runneth over like blood from a stone.

Dear Flyover States: Angry Cheeto is your fault. Our task is to make you think you like the retaliation.

http://www.thegatewaypundit.com/2017/12/flashback-obama-says-manufacturing-jobs-arent-coming-back-trump-sets-record-highest-number-new-manufacturing-jobs-month-ever/ AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH Don't worry Barry, You'll be able to drown your sorrows with your "wife's" dong tonight.

And Franken is gone. The absolute state of the Democratic party. Keep hacking away at your throat. Apparently hard to get through than you'd think. Who is next?

there's not an actual fucking programmer on this site. just socially anxious wannabes staring from the outside in.

Deadlines makes me masturbate to IBM Model M ASMR videos. Should I quit?

I liked Windows 8.1

I was told what an amazing and fantastic job I've done this year. My work was shown the the entire company and I got a lot of great feedback. My reward? I get to be on 2 Scrum teams now instead of 1. Nevermind that this is actually impossible. The moral of the story: never do well on the job because the company will just expect more out of you.

Make sure that your code compiles before pushing, you fucking moron!

"People" who indent with 2 spaces should die!

Did my post actually conjure those forest fires?

Monthly reminder that putting { on its own line is bad, for the same reason that putting a blank line after every 'if' in Python is bad: It's forcing air where it's the least needed. Where some air does help, put a blank line instead. Let's rid the world of this silly style mistake!

Been coding for about 8 years, accomplished quite alot of impossible jobs, write over 10 languages, and even given lectures and talks but for some reason I still find OOP unatural and literally have to relearn it every time. I get the whole concept enough that I can teach it, but when am coding I'll avoid it at all costs.I feel stupid cause of this one thing.

My fingers smell like garlic and it is making me hungry. I would like to go home and have something to eat.

What is this gay shit? I understand this place is unmoderated but for fucks sakes..

I've been trying to get fired for years. Can you niggers hurry it up.

being an uber driver would be more satisfying